About 25 years ago there was a grocery shop we called Jack the squish squish, cos the ads showed some bloke doing a slicing thing with a a big sword. I think it might have really been named Jack the Slasher - probably wouldn't be allowed today. It was a dreadful shop, more of a barn really with shelves so tall that I was always fearful that shit was gonna fall over and kill me or at the very least make me cornered and stuck in there, with the only way out being to chew through suspect food that 'could well have been passed its best. I went a couple of times, but had to run like the crazy cow I was, in and outta there, cos the smell and the darkness and the giant shelves just left me gasping for air.
Any of those stores where the shelves are stacked taller than 2 basket ballers high just make my heart race - not in a good way.
But that's not why I am not much fond of ALDI.
I actually like to go in and trial the lucky dip of sale items all lined up in the middle. Sometimes I can go in there and find nothing and other times I reckon I could load up a few trolleys except that I don't like to have to put my dollar in. It's often the sort of stuff you didn't know you wanted or needed or liked til you saw it and then you just had to have it. Pretty clever marketing really.
It's the smell of the fruit and veg that I don't like. I am sure that it's fine, I just really really don't like the smell.
But that doesn't stop me doing the occasional centre aisle crawl.
My girl and I went in on Monday and found some useful bits, mostly there were sheets in lovely colours that caught my eye.
I do like a bit of manchester, although it has been more than a decade since I bought anything other than white sheets cos sometime ago I must have gotten it in my head that I could bleach white sheets to buggery, but now of course I am allergic to the bleach too, which can only be a good thing if it means I can get pretty coloured sheets.
Trouble is that the mattresses here in the big house are pretty thick, yeh like me - just getting in ahead of ya, and so I have been buying fitted sheets that are 50cm deep and these ALDI jobbies are only 40cm deep, but the colours and the 100% cotton-ness and the 300 thread count lured me in.
I raced home and washed 'em cos I am fucking allergic to all that stuff that goes into fabric stuff and then popped 'em on the bed. All in a big hurry cos if they were good, I was gonna go and get some more.
Well they are bloody marvellous! They fit well and are comfy to sleep on....Yippee!
So today I went hunting for more of the same. Southport Park - only the European pillow cases left. Bugger.
Q Super Store - nothing, not even an empty packet.
Bugger!
So as I was driving I remembered that Stevie had told me about another place at Carrara, near his golf club. Not quite on my home but not too much of a detour either.
And there they were, a small tower of sheets still available, so I dived right in and found exactly what I was looking for. Bloody brilliant. I felt like all my christmases had come at once.
But what I have discovered is that if you find something you like you'd better grab it right there and then. Don't let the grass grow cos it will more than likely be gone tomorrow. Not the grocery stuff, just the centre aisle stuff. And this might be why people do indeed pop their dollars in for the trolleys.
I got 'em home and have thrown 'em through the hot long wash cycle and tomorrow they will be good to go.
And here's the thing about stuff you get from ALDI, it is nearly always very good quality. I would not hesitate to buy just about anything from there, anything that is, except the European type ginger biscuits that we thought might be good for pudding. They were just not nice.
Perhaps we should have thought to remove the plastic stuff on the back of 'em cos I rather doubt that added to the flavour.
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